Conspiracy Science

While looking around for new 9/11 conspiracies I found an interesting article that uses sarcasm to talk about conspiracy theorists: What I Learned

I think it's absolutely one of the best reviews of the 9/11 conspiracy theorist mindset I've ever seen. I want to share some of my favorite lines from it.

• The silence of the thousands of military & civilian authorities who must have been involved in order to pull off such a widespread conspiracy and the silence of the true witnesses and recovery/cleanup volunteers can be easily explained by the government buying their silence. Thousands. And it's worked perfectly, since nobody actually part of the conspiracy has stepped forward.
• Top Pentagon officials suspiciously and abruptly cancelled travel plans on Sept. 10 for the next morning, apparently due to security concerns, so they were obviously part of the plot. They cancelled their travel so they could stay where it was safe. In their office building. In the Pentagon.
• If the 9-11 Commission report is flawed or incomplete, it obviously means that the attacks were orchestrated by the United States, not that the report was simply...flawed. Or incomplete.
• The U.S. is actually quite popular worldwide; so much so, in fact, that its government must create artificial terrorist organizations to attack it. Left to their own devices, everybody else pretty much respects Americans and leaves them alone.
• It takes the complacency or cooperation of the world's largest superpower to hijack a defenseless civilian aircraft.
• The WTC towers fell in what was obviously a controlled demolition. The largest, messiest, deadliest, most witnessed, most mismanaged, most ill-timed, most poorly executed, and most uncontrolled controlled demolition in history.
• Those plane crashes were like so totally fake cuz they were so totally unlike all the real fiery passenger jet crashes into buildings I've seen in real life.
• When you refer to the planes, say "alleged aircraft." When referring to the terrorists, say "alleged terrorists." Because not only can we not be sure they even existed, but also, "alleged" has such a nice, objective ring to it.
• The same nefarious conspirators that pulled off the single largest concerted suicide attack in history forgot to make a hole in the Pentagon to help fakethe airliner impact site.
• Incompetence, being unprepared, not foreseeing events, rushed decisions, finger pointing, blame trading, and hysteria equal "conspiracy."
• More information only muddles "the truth:" The most accurate and complete reports of any disaster are from selections of the first hurried reports, not from more complete, thoughtful analysis and more thorough eyewitness reports that come later
• When we hear witnesses describing "something like a bomb going off" in the Pentagon, we should ignore subsequent (and concurrent) eyewitness reports of a rather large passenger jet flying into exactly the same spot, and ignored reports and photos of engines, landing gear, other aircraft parts, aircraft passengers, and other debris being found on and in the site, and absolutely no evidence of any explosive.
• No buildings in history ever fell because of fire until 9-11. And if the WTC towers were the first modern, steel structures to collapse by fire, it is not a testament to the intelligent engineering put into the design of skyscrapers in general, but only evidence that the WTC was brought down by other means. No, I don't mean by airplanes filled with thousands of pounds of fuel ramming into them, I mean by a bomb.
• Steel supports must liquify at their melting point of 3000°F in order to weaken and fail, and everything that metalurgists and engineers have told us about heat of only about 700°Fweakening steel is false, and for thousands of years, metal workers like blacksmiths and armorers have just had it all wrong, because they only needed large blast furnaces, spigots, and molds to form horseshoes, swords, and plowshares from liquid metal, and they didn't need a hammer and anvil, as you see in Hollywood movies' special effects.
• It doesn't make sense that remains of the hijackers and passengers, who hit the sides of mostly open-spaced office buildings at hundreds of miles an hour and ejected out the other side, were some of the first remains discovered, and not under thousands of tons of rubble straight down. The body parts must have been planted on streets, on the roofs of buildings, and through broken windows by burglars. Or something.
• If video is poor quality, or with low frame rates (like with a surveilance film), it must be fake.
• The WTC towers fell straight down (more or less), which proves that it was a controlled demolition. If it were a true building falling down, it would havefallen over like a popsicle stick.
• Although video clearly shows smoke and debris being blown out the pancaking WTC upper floors as the floors collapse against each other, but video of planned, controlled building demolitions clearly shows bright flashes of explosions before the building begins collapsing, the explosives planted in the towers must be some new super-secret kind because the explosive effect obviously goes back in time and starts the collapse of the building before the explosions throw stuff out the windows. So now there's the whole "Government Stuff Can Travel Through Time" consipiracy, and don't get me started.
• George W. Bush is at once America's most deviously intelligent autocrat and its most stupidest president ever.
• When an eyewitness describes a loud sound or strong, sudden vibration as "like a bomb," it means unequivocally that it was a bomb, because, you know, people have so much experience identifying bomb noises versus nearby passenger jet crashes
• 99.9% of the world's top engineers, architects, physicists, and chemists are all wrong, and I am right, because I read the Intarweb and I am so smart.

And the most telling:

• If I repeat the same absurd claims enough times, they will become truth: There are over 6.5 billion people in the world, and about 1.1 billion of those people use the Internet. Chances are, I could claim anything on the Web, and at a million-to-one odds, over a thousand people would believe me. In the age of the Internet, that makes me an expert.
• I can't be wrong because thousands of people believe my theories. But you can be wrong even though hundreds of millions believe you, because we all know there are millions of stupid people in the world.
• Any information that comes from the government is suspect, because everybody knows that "the government" is one vast conspiracy utterly controlled by a small number of evil-doers, not made up of millions of honest, hard-working people, at all levels of bureaucracy, of all ages, of all parties, of all walks of life, each fighting in their own way for truth, justice, and the American way.
• The government has a track record of blowing up its own buildings to push its own nefarious agenda, like they did in the Oklahoma City bombing and the 1993 WTC attack, because, you know, those attacks enabled the government to, you know,... do stuff, and stuff. So you can see this isn't a new idea for them.

Who am I kidding? The whole thing is great, check it out!

In other news, my review of the Zeitgeist Radio Address is going to wait, because Peter Joseph implied that there will be another show debunking the debunkers, but if the next show is a regular show then I'll just finish it up. I'm trying to better allocate my time here, especially with that new Alex Jones movie coming out in 2 days.

QOTD, From Prison Planet: